Sunday, 1 January 2017

New Year Truths: My Racism, My Selves, My Journeys

This is the first day of the new year and I find myself, trying to convince myself, not to be a racist.
That was the last day of the last year and I bind my selves, dying to reminisce about times, craziest.
Tomorrow is the first and the last of the years of my journeys, sighing tired, I exist, energy laziest.

Sunday, 13 December 2015


She told me it would be okay
That I should go there, with them
What I didn't realize that day
Was that they, was actually, just, him

He molded me and branded me
Into a creation of his
He, my Master
I, his little miss

Had I known he was not my first
I could have avoided the later mess
I watched my freedom drive away in her hearse
Along with the freedoms of the rest

There were many of us, "slaves"
Cult members, we now know
About their knack for discipline, everyone raved
We had no one, no help, nowhere to go

I fought and I fought against the tyranny they called HOLY
I watched myself disintegrate, surely and slowly
To their whim, I bowed, and accepted as real
No love, just hate, was all I could I feel

So now, let's return to my second Master, the man
Try to understand my memories, if you can
First her, now him, my mother, then her brother
Laid still, sanity killed, I've always belonged to another

She beat me, she loved it, I cried, inside died
He touched me, he loved it, tried suicide, came alive
Now confused?
Then, let me explain the name of this game

Suicide is Freedom, to a miss of six, abused and sexed
Control gone, liberty lost, no place to hide, and vexed
Tied to beds and beaten
Lied on beds and entered
She lent me to others for their pleasure and rage
Eyes opened to these "things" while I was still underage

I've been trained for slavery, bending to others' will
My freedom?  My body, at any moment, I can kill
I tried many times and failed, oh well
Who will accept me now?  Where will I go? Heaven or Hell?

Enters my next Master, THE ONE
He whom I see everywhere but is never seen
To HIM, even now, I run
HE never sees me as dirty, only clean

She told me, HE, THE ONE, would hate me forever
HE told me to obey her, my mother, to disrespect her never
So I did it, because I loved HIM, HIS WORD, I deeply felt
HIS WORD made it okay, the fucked-up life I was dealt

So, I read HIS WORD, every minute, every day, every week
From Genesis to Revelations, made me strong, erased the weak
Every spare minute I had, to HIS WORD I listened, I peeked
My interests, my curiosities had now been thoroughly piqued

But, wait, are these words really from HIS mouth?
From whose orifice did these scriptures utter out?
Then, I begin, to question EVERYTHING.  What is right?
I made a plan. Run away. Soon. When she leaves. At night.

May 1, 1995. I did it. I left. I was 17.
My older sister, also a runaway, was not quite as keen.
She knew the style of our mother, instincts invisible, demeanor mean.
My sister also knew of this harsh world, specifics of which I hadn't seen.

Welcoming me into her home, she shared with me all she had
For her sacrifices and love, if I could, I would be more than glad
But, I cant, you see, these emotions for me are strange and unnatural
People abuse, are not to be loved or trusted, my truths are factual

I have a daughter now, and to this ONE Master, I yet, pray
Give me a facade of love and care, for this is not my trained way
Let my childhood hurricanes produce her storms of protection
May my abusers' thunders precede her rains of love and laughter
May she know an authentic childhood and a beautiful life ever after

But, know, I must go and continue to break my personal chains
For so long, my life, my body, my freedom, others have claimed
All I know, is how to be Slave or Master, from them I was taught
Maybe, one day, I will lead a different life, have a new thought
Until then, I belong to the one who knows me the most
So, to that one, I raise my glass, I make this toast
Know who I am, see me for me
I am now a slave but I yearn to be free
C.A.C - Cheap Ass Copyright
These are my words from my life from my heart to you. Thank you for respecting and appreciating that.

Monday, 14 July 2014

Make Me Marvellous With Minimal Money Monday: Beauty Shop Beauties

Okay, y'all.  Sooooo, even though I WWOOF a lot and live on farm 60% of the time, I still like to get girly, hmmmmmm-hmmmmmmmm...but, a sistah is on a budget.  What to do, what to do?  Head over to the beauty shop, y'all, okaaaaaaaaaaay, ok  :)  :)

3 lippies (plus 1 for my daughter), an eye pencil with smudger, and 3 eyebrow shavers, drum roll please ---- 11 POUNDS (20 dollars US).  Can y'all say deal?  Well, I can, that was a deal and a steal all rolled in one 
:)  :)

Lippie #1:  Sleek Creme Lipstick in Flaming Berry

Lippie #2:  Rapsodi Cosmetics Intensive Wear 08

Lippie #3:  Doris Michael LP21 Miss Purple

Whether in London (Peckham, where I purchased these gorgeous lippies) or in your local beauty shop, be sure to check out the makeup section.  It'll be well worth it!
Ciao 4 Now, Y'All!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GET TO KNOW ME - TAG, Y'ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, this was nice.  I had SO MUCH FUN doing this Get To Know Me TAG!  I think - I probably - I shoulda done it a while back...anywhooooooooooooooooo.  Get To Know Me, Y'all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  By the way, thank you to LuvHerLipstik for creating your blog and thus motivating me to finally do this tag.  LUVS  :)  :)

1. What are you wearing?

Red lipstick

2. Ever been in love?

3. Ever had a terrible breakup?

4.  How tall are you?

5. How much do you weigh?
70 kilos

6. Any tattoos?


7. Any piercings?


8. OTP?
My sweet friend Alex (a.k.a. King of the Ratchets) and the Chocolate to end all chocolates :)  :)

9. Favorite show?
Golden Girls

10.  Favorite bands?
Danity Kane

11: Something you miss?
Sour pickles with long peppermints sticks (my Chi-town peeps will appreciate the utmost importance of these 2)

12: Favourite song?
I Love You - Mary J

13: How old are you?

14: Zodiac sign?

15: Quality you look for in a partner?

16: Favourite Quote?
Pain is weakness leaving the body.

17: Favourite actor?
Meryl Streep

18: Favourite colour?

19: Loud music or soft?

20: Where do you go when you’re sad?
Wherever there's quiet

21: How long does it take you to shower?
That depends...if I'm on a farm 5-10 minutes.  If I'm in the city, longer.

22: How long does it take you to get ready in the morning?
That depends, too.  

23: Ever been in a physical fight?

24.  Turn on?
Cocky Swag

25. Turn off?

26: The reason I joined Youtube? ...started a blog?
YouTube - for a rant
Blog - I yearned to return to writing.

27. Fears?
Living without my rage

28. Last thing that made you cry?
A movie

29. Last time you said you loved someone?
This morning

30: Meaning behind your YouTube Name? blog name?
YouTube (my name) - Just me, I am what I am
ColouredLipsGlobalTrips (blog) - need I say more?

31: Last book you read?
The Book of Fathers

32: The book you’re currently reading?

Fifty Shades of Grey

33: Last show you watched?
The People's Court

34: Last person you talked to?
My friend, Clelia

35: The relationship between you and the person you last texted?
A couchsurfing host, perfect strangers

36: Favourite food?
This one is difficult - Italian and Mexican

37: Place you want to visit?
Russian Federation

38: Last place you were?

Save the Children Charity Shop

39: Do you have a crush?
Does Daniel Craig count?

40: Last time you kissed someone?
Two days ago

41: Last time you were insulted
Last month while volunteering on a farm

42: Favourite flavor of sweet?
Sour apple

43: What instruments do you play?
I used to play the piano.

44: Favourite piece of jewellery?
My black and silver bracelets (one was given to me 6 years ago by my BFF and one was given to me this Xmas by my daughter

45: Last sport you played?

46: Last song you sang?
Clocks - Kat Dahlia

47: Favourite chat up line?
Just give me your telephone number

48: Have you ever used it?
Of course!  :)  :)

49: Last time you hung out with anyone?
This morning

50: Who should answer these questions next?

Monday, 14 April 2014

Make Me Marvellous with Minimal Money Mondays: #travelhacking


     Alright already, so I'm not the FIRST one to post about this Godsend known as #travelhacking, but please, be patient with me.  And, thus, the first tip to travel hacking is discovered - PATIENCE! You will get that deal, you will get that low price, the red square next to the date and time will show up (avid users of the EUROLINES website will appreciate that one  :).  Sometimes, I will find after a successful search that I have been looking for a bargain for 3-4 hours, it happens people, and guess what?  It's SO worth the time and energy.  Alright now, y'all, let's move on down to the next tip - TIME, TIME, TIME (and I hear it waits for no one).  So, c'mon then y'all, let's go!

     Oh, dear magic 8-ball, dost thou see my future? No, not possible.  DARN IT!  Guess, I'll just have to best to figure it out on my own.  Okay, here goes, 3 months from now, I will be on that flight booked on and THIS will save me at least HALF the cost of the ticket.  TIME, people, TIME, its just gotta be managed.  Because I travel on a budget, I often find that if I know my schedule then I save. I don't fly often but when I do, I use  More often than not, a 2-3 month window will lower the cost dramatically.  And that makes a cheap travel queen, like myself, sleep easy.

     To sleep or not to sleep,  THAT is the real question.  Y'all know it's coming - sleeping on the bus/train in order to save on those killer accommodation prices!  WHEW!  I had to, I had to write it, I had to.  No, no one would RATHER sleep on a bus/train as opposed to sleeping in a nice comfy bed but when you wake up the next morning and realise how much you've saved, the bus/train becomes more and more appealing.  Yes, really.  And, oftentimes, the night prices are the cheaper prices.  Another perk of night travel is that on many of these bus trips movies are shown and that makes the experience even more enjoyable (see my post on EUROLINES to see that movies are more of a staple rather than a rarity).

Speaking of EUROLINES and their already low prices, there is a way to get an even lower price when booking with them - website 1 vs. website 2.  I know, a bit cheesy but accurate, nonetheless  :)  For example, let's say you would like to book a trip from London to Budapest.  First, you look on the UK website, (website 1).  Then, you go over to the Hungarian EUROLINES website, (website 2).  Both websites will list a price of around 200 dollars US.  However, on, you will find an even lower price based on the fact that this ticket can not be modified or refunded (which I have found to be extremely useful and worth booking).  In all fairness, offers a non-refundable option but I have found that offers and even lower price. 

2)   TIME
3)   SLEEP

The key factors in successful need to be flexible with the above mentioned and also willing to sacrifice them, if needed.  But, it's well worth it in the end. 

Well, in the words of the ultra-savvy Mr. Bugs Bunny, THAT'S ALL FOLKS!


Monday, 17 March 2014

First-Time HITCHHIKING/THUMBING - in BELGIUM: Make Me Marvellous with Minimal Money Mondays


 I DID IT!  I DID IT!  I DID IT!  I hitchhiked!  So, y'all, I'm in Belgium and as the unofficial queen of cheap (that's me) would have it, I wanted to travel even cheaper than Eurolines or the local bus company could offer...the thumb it was!   I, or rather we, my daughter and I, were blessed to be accompanied by someone, Dido, who had hitched before. 
     We started out slow and we were thinking this was a bad idea but then we got our first little the back of an even smaller car.  He took us to a roundabout where we were able to be picked up by a woman who brought us closer to our destination of Gent.  While in the car, we spoke with this woman (who also hitchhikes) about the paranoia which prevents some drivers from picking us hitchhikers.  She told us that she usually picks up hitchhikers in hopes of someone doing the same for her.  Remember that, anyone who reads this post, you know, that do unto others as you would have them do unto you thing  :)   After we exited this ride, we waited about 5 minutes before the next angel of mercy arrived to rescue us from our roadside waiting.  It was a father/son combo - I believe they stopped because they saw we were with a little girl (my daughter) and they felt a sort of connection.  This could be completely false but after this hitchhiking experience and considering the individuals and couples who did pick us up, I believe that's the secret to successful hitchhiking - finding that connection. 

     After this ride, we were picked up by a Turkish Belgian couple and while I feel he would have been just as content passing us by, the woman was more than eager to have the company.  This was the last hitch of this leg of our journey and we were kindly dropped off in the centre of town (Gent). 


After we had a late lunch, we headed off towards the west side of town in order to link up with the major highway to our next and final destination of Aalter.  SO many drivers passed us by and it made me realise why hitching at night isn't the greatest idea but we hadn't planned to be out so late.  I must say, though, that many a passerby offered us good advice like where to stand, once they saw our cardboard sign.

We set a time limit for ourselves (30 minutes) and made a plan that if no one picked us up within this time frame then we would just do the unspeakable and take public transport...but, ALAS, we were picked up with a few minutes to spare and dropped off a bit closer to Aalter.  About 10 minutes after that, we were picked up by our last car and dropped off not just at the city's edge but at the train station were a friend came and met us. 
All in all, this was a great experience.  We learned a lot about hitching, ourselves and surprisingly psychology...guilt is a powerful emotion, if ya know what I mean.  Until next time.  CIAO 4 NOW, Y'ALL!